What You Should Do If You And Your Partner Have Mismatched Libidos
Physical intimacy is a natural form of expression in partner relationships. In today's fast-paced world, however, it can sometimes be difficult to find the time or energy to engage in regular sexual activity. If you and your partner are experiencing misaligned sex drives, know that this is not an uncommon occurrence. In fact, a 2015 study revealed that as many as 80 percent of couples had experienced mismatched libidos within the last 30 days or so (via Huffpost). Sexual desire can be influenced by any number of factors on any given day, including stress or prescription medications. In one study, it was even found that men diagnosed with sleep apnea had decreased levels of testosterone, which led to reports of a lower sex drive (via Science Daily). With so many factors at play, what can couples do if they're looking to overcome these potential obstacles?
Seth Meyers Psy.D. suggests that partners explore other forms of sexual intimacy beyond penetration (via Psychology Today). Such activities can include erotic massage, masturbation, or the use of porn (via Health). The important thing is to openly communicate your desires, while also being honest regarding your personal comfort level with any new activities.
Open communication, self-awareness, and experimentation can all help increase intimacy
Additionally, psychologist and sex therapist Janet Brito explains that being aware of what stimulates you personally can also help when looking to increase intimacy in a relationship. For example, taking note of what makes you feel in touch with your sexuality, such as a luxurious bubble bath or even a freshly cleaned house, can help to set the mood. Mood can also go hand in hand with energy, so paying attention to the time of day when you feel your energy levels are at their highest can help identify a mutual window of time when you and your partner are feeling most aroused.
It's important to remember that differences in sex drive do not automatically indicate something is wrong within the partnership. Open communication, experimentation, and self-awareness of what makes you feel like your most confident, sensual self are all ways to help keep connection and intimacy thriving between you and your partner.